givemearmstopraywith:

i’m a clove of garlic and God is crushing me under a knife so i add flavour to the soup

micellars:

micellars:

micellars:

ppl getting so mad about jaskier having to walk on foot next to geralt is so funny like he’s a trust fund baby and geralt is geriatric. 

geralt, trying to indicate he trusts jaskier after many months of companionship: you look tired. lets swap you can ride roach
jaskier: i want you to look at me like look at everything about me and then explain to me what about what you’re seeing makes you think i can ride a horse

if anything their relationship is like. like imagine a man came up to you while you were at a drive thru and started talking to you and when you went to drive off he just walked alongside you and kept talking and instead of doing something normal you just. drove at 4 mph for the rest of your life

barbaras-caucasity:

sounddesignerjeans:

we have a real motherfucker here, a true idiot child, someone please come collect your bastard

Walmart trying to contact my mom over the loudspeaker

minuty:

“There is a voice that doesn’t use words. Listen.”

—

themuppetmasterencyclopedia:

Miss Piggy’s Guide to Life Photos

chestnutroan:

snow leopard girl 😄

caspersscareschool:

the eeason my dinner takes so long is i have to kiss all my onions for 45 minutes each before mincing them. this makes them blush which brings out their sweetness which is why im the highest ranking chef in the world. my final message

catasters:

alexsimonfrancoisjohan:

i love hanging out with girls who are also trainwrecks bc i can like vomit all over the side of a car and theyre like We’ve all been there :)